I was going through some old files of mine and I found a funny, not-quite-completed list called Things I've learned in the last two years: and other observations about college. I think I started it back around Christmas vacation but I've finished it off now. Seeing as the end of my university 'career' is coming up quick, I figure now is a good a time as any to post the list. So without further adieu....
- An eleven o’clock class is too early, but you have no problem being up at 6 AM, as long as you’re still awake from the night before.
- “Sign it's been a fun weekend? Tonight's the first night in three nights I'm sleeping in my own bed.” (courtesy of Mike Eng's Blog.)
- Getting a good night’s rest is four hours of sleep. (Mike again)
- University bookstores suck. At the end of every semester you can sell your used books back to the store for about 2% of their original cost. My question is, how can you call a textbook ‘used’ if it’s still in its original cellophane wrapping?
- This past year I’ve heard the same thing said many times, “After this weekend, I’m not going to drink for awhile.” I’ve also learned that “awhile” means until Wednesday
- Nobody ever turns down free beer. It just doesn’t happen. You could be sick, drunk, on prescription medication, or allergic to barley. But you know what else you are? Poor.
- Ways to tell if a party was good: 1) The morning paper is on the steps when you get home. 2) Instead of picking up a burger from McDonald’s on the way home you get an egg mcmuffin. 3) You see a young kid, in full hockey gear, leaving for early morning hockey practice with his dad as you drive up the street on your way to going to bed. (Originally from an email sent home Dec. 7,2002 5:49 AM)
- Eating an actual meal becomes a luxury (Mike)
- In college, people spend a lot of their time on MSN Messenger. Actually, we probably spend more time talking on MSN than we do on the phone, or talking to people in person. But don’t you wish that the way you talked to people on MSN could transfer over to other conversations? I mean, if I’m talking to someone on the street and they tell a story that is supposed to be funny but isn’t, I would love to just look at them and say “lol”, stick an “AWAY” tag on my forehead and walk away. Or maybe, when I’m on the phone, I could just put the phone down in mid conversation, walk away for 2 hours, then come back and say “gotta go” and hang up.
- If journalism professors are supposedly “rich with real-life journalistic experience” why do they always tell the same stories?
- As winter break approaches, all you can think about is leaving school and having a whole month off to party with your old friends. But after you’ve been home for a few days you wonder what all your college friends are doing, and you start thinking about how much fun you could be having if you had a whole month off to party with them.
- A lot of people complain that they gain weight while they’re away at college. I don’t understand why though. I mean, most people only eat one or two meals a day during the week, binge drink all weekend and puke it all up, then feel so sick they don’t eat again for three days. You’d think you’d lose weight this way. It’s baffling.
- Just an observation: This probably only applies to Mike and me but it seems very odd that we spend more time wasting our time than we do actually concentrating on school. Examples: Daily Deco, Space Ghost, and Strong Bad.
- Jello Shooters rule.
- Just when you think beer can’t get any better, they put Don Cherry on the can.
- It is much easier to steal new plates, cups and cutlery from restaurants than it is to actually wash the dirty dishes piling up in the sink. For the record, Boston Pizza and Tim Horton’s both have excellent dishes. (Don’t they Meghan?)
- You can still pass a Fine Arts class even if you’ve never managed to stay for the full three hours.
- Boredom and/or alcohol leads to garden gnome theft.
- Hope is quite possibly the greatest town in the country.
- To quote Homer: “Alcohol is the cause of, and solution to, all of life’s problems.”
- You meet some of the best people you’ll ever meet while you’re in college.
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