Tuesday, January 31, 2006

Well forget Vegas, everybody's got a reason to say no it seems.

That's fine though, really. I just thought I'd try and spice things up a bit.

Anyways, my birthday's a long way away still to be worrying about it now.

Sunday, January 29, 2006

With other people doing Jokes of the Day and Odd Facts of the Day, I decided I needed to come up with some catchy new feature. So, with that in mind, I give you, the Weekend Awards, or the Drunkies....

Best case of pretending to be a lesbian in order to get rid of a guy...

Best drunken performance by a duo or group...
Jenna and Kelsey

Best case of pissing off Randy by doing something stupid...

Meanest Burn award...

"Smartest" decision after a night of drinking...
(tie) Getting up early to go snowboarding - Chris, Jenna, Derrick
Driving home at like 7 a.m. with limited sleep - Kelsey

Actual smartest decision...
Sleeping in then waking other people up for fun - Nick

Angriest person after being woken up by Nick...

Ugliest purchase...

Best Disappearing Act...

Funniest Moments with Cars...
(tie) Nick - No E-Brake
Kyle - running out of gas after purchasing "The Bitch"

Saturday, January 28, 2006

playing a tough game of Chaser...
Me: Fuck this, I quit!
Amanda: Fine, you can't play anymore then!

At my grandparents 50th anniversary, when Chris went downstairs to crash a wedding...
Me: I've never been prouder to be a member of this family.
Dave: Wow, that's saying a lot.

"I love watching dogs back up." - Bucholtz

"Why you gotta be all up in my grill?" - Ian, to Amanda, who was sitting too close apparently.

"I like goats and they like me." - Buchs on msn, for absolutely no reason.

Last night was a pretty good night - went to Tara's house and drank there. Drank a lot actually.

Two highlights of the evening - Chris winning a lot of money at the casino; and me forgetting to pull the E-brake on my car and having to chase it down the road, unlock it, get in, and stop it before it hit a car parked on the street. It was a tough maneuver, but I did it of course.

Cuz even when I'm tanked I got skills.

Funny website info:

I checked my website stats for the first time in ages. There were some funny ways people found this site over the past few months. The following web searches brought people to Classic Times...

"how to use a coat hanger to unlock car without keys"
"whats the difference between yams and sweet potatoes"
"Aaron Pritchett gay"
"evil alien conquerors"
"drunken girl pictures"
"Bo Jackson sweet potato pie"

and my personal favourite search referral...

"fuck off"

Who searches for that?

Vegas Update:

The idea is gaining some steam. On the probably/maybe list: Me, Kels, Buchs, Lambie. The only definite No's are Jer, Amanda, Sean and Rach. I don't think its quite gonna be a 20 person shaker, but if a few people come, it'll still be rad.

Thursday, January 26, 2006

:: Vegas, Baby! ::

I've come up with a brilliant idea. So brilliant it may just make your head explode.

As many of you already know, Kels is planning on a trip to the Giggle Dam for her birthday, which is March 9. (Everyone should come, by the way).

The Dam is a wicked idea, judging from the one-and-only time I went, which was just before Christmas.

Anyway, what I liked best about the idea was that it wasn't one of the following things: Roosters, Shark's Club, or going out for dinner and then getting plastered at Fort Pub and/or someone's house.

Since we all turned 19, we've done those ideas to death. This is something different while still combining our two true loves - fun, and alcohol.

So, with Kelsey's plan as an inspiration, I started thinking about something I often think about:

How can I one-up Kelsey?

Vegas, baby. That's how.

(Just kidding, I'm not trying to one-up anyone, but her birthday was what got me thinkin'.)

I'll be turning 25 which, in my mind, makes me officially old. That's a quarter-century for Christ's sake.

And I'd like to go out with a bang.

And I haven't been on a vacation in a long, long time. (No Mike, Vulcan, AB does not count). Also, within the next five months I'll most likely being dropping my entire savings account on a townhouse, and from that point on I'll be a poor schmuck with limited funds for social activities such as drinking my face off and making a fool of myself.

So before that happens, I'd like to see what kind of trouble I can get into.

It's single-handedly about the greatest birthday party idea ever. There are already a handful of people on the "Maybe" list - Kels and Ian. And Lambie said he'd be in if we get hookers (Consider it done my friend).

Unlike my thousands of other "brilliant ideas" I come up with but never follow through on, I'm quite serious about this one, and will begin organizing it quick-like. We don't necessarily have to go in April near my birthday, but I don't want to interrupt slo-pitch season.

So, who else is in? Speak now.

And answer Yes.

Wednesday, January 25, 2006

"GF Strong is gonna look GF Weak after Brad kicks the shit out of it" - Seaner's MSN name tonight.

And he's off!

Brad's finally off to GF Strong tomorrow - the best head injury rehab place in BC for anyone who doesn't know.

He'll be there for awhile probably, it'll be an intense amount of work for him, and we can't visit much, but it's the last stop before he gets to come home.

Give 'em hell buddy. See ya real soon.

Monday, January 23, 2006

:: Gym Theory ::

Went to the gym tonight after watchin' the Canucks game at Slapshots, and heard this interesting idea being discussed by two 20-something guys lifting weights next to where I was riding the bike.

They were discussing the merits of picking up girls at the gym, and decided that the best idea was to try and meet an average-to-relatively hot girl with "potential", who was maybe not in absolutely peak shape - but not, as one guy put it "without hope."

I'm pretty sure the subject came up because of one girl on the eliptical machine who was pretty attractive - not exactly 105 lbs, but she had some serious guns and was certainly not a "butter face".

Basically, it was these guys' theory that they should go after girls with potential because once they "got real hot" the girl would be out of their league, and the average guy wouldn't have a chance.

And, one guy pointed out, you know they'll get hotter. After all, they're at the gym.

I guess it's called buying low and selling high.

It sounds like the typical thing some guys at the gym (or Kyle and Derrick) would come up with, although I guess it doesn't have be just a slimy guy idea - could work both ways I guess, although I don't know if chicks think like that.

Matter of fact, I rarely know what girls think about anything.

I'm not saying I really agree or disagree with their philosophy, but I thought it was mildly amusing at least and worth a post (especially since I'd gone awhile without one).

Whadda ya think?

Saturday, January 14, 2006

"You should beat up Jesus, I'll give you five bucks." - Amanda

"I wanna meet a girlfriend when I get to G.F. Strong so I can have some handicapped sex." - Gorski

Yeah, he's back.

Last night, there were some of you who complained about my lack of uploaded pictures. Well whiners, complain no more, the My Pictures link on the left now contains three new sections:

Christmas 2005, Dinner Party, and Random Drunk - a combo platter of photos from some parties - including the 'lil shaker here last night.

So don't say I never did nothin' for ya.

Sunday, January 08, 2006

"If I get married it'll be to a stripper I get knocked up." - Buchs

"I'm choking on my own delight." - Buchs again, smashed.

When I told Buchs about Jenna's dog sleeping in my room when he was here over Christmas...
Me: Well where the hell do you want him to sleep?
Buchs: I dunno, wolverine exchange?

(I don't even know what to say about that..)

"I just juiced myself." - Kels

"Yeah, well at least I don't need tampons!!" - Sean's comeback to one of the girls.

"This week was a big ball of stupid." - Ian

"Me and Rach are queens of gracefullness." - Kels

"We have to love a lot of people in my family but we don't like any of them." - Kels, on importance of family.

Then this morning, hungover, these two gems from Kels, not even a minute apart...

"I'm just going to stop putting things in my mouth."

"Note to self: Don't bend over."

Seriously folks, not even I can make this stuff up. Well I could I guess, but I'm not.

This weekend was a good one - my first of the New Year sans beer. I wasn't planning on drinking at all really, but then decided to down a bottle or two of wine, which was actually a really good idea. It's not as bad for you as beer, and it doesn't result in the crushing defeat/blackout that occurs when one drinks Nick Nolte-levels of hard liquor.

All in a all, a good incident-free weekend - nice switch from the "high intensity" New Year's bash.

Now, for the next week or so, I'll be spending a lot of time putting together the video/slide show for my grand parents 50th anniversary party on the 21st. It's a time consuming endeavour, so I guess I should finally get crackin' with it.

Tuesday, January 03, 2006

:: Day 1 ::

Today it was back to the gym - beginning Phase 2 of what I previously dubbed The Nick Rebuilding Plan. I'm already down 41 lbs. with, I figure, 40 more to go.

Gimme six or seven months and every dick from high school who mocked me, and every drunken jackass I ever had to punch for calling me fat (ahem, Bucholtz) will be eating their words.

And every chick who ever said 'No' will be wishing they hadn't.

Too late now bitches*.

*Editor's note: I don't actually think you're bitches. I just like acting tough.