Friday, February 22, 2008

"If I made a drinking game out of how many times I logged onto Facebook during the day I'd be dead by noon." - Meghan

"Is it bad that I just looked at the dishes in my sink and, rather than thinking 'I should wash them' I thought 'Meh, at least four more days 'til I'm out of dishes?" - Meghan again, on a roll.

:: Impressive, repulsive or somewhere in between? ::

At work today a few of us were, as we often are, wasting time talking about mindless, non-important stuff, and somehow we got onto the subject of drinking. Then somebody posed a question that baffled me to the point where I don't even want to think about it anymore because it hurts my brain:

In your lifetime, how many beers do you think you've drank?

My instant response was "17!" but then, when I realized that he said "in your lifetime" and not "during lunch" I took my answer back. Now, it's easy just to say "A lot" but try really thinking about it.

People's answers will obviously vary wildy because some people occasionally drink other drinks - like me and delicious vodka or Jeremy and whiskey - while some of you, like Chris, Sean and Ian, are strictly beer drinkers. Also, we're all operating on varying levels of alcohol addiction here.

Still, it's a staggering number of beers. Thousands. It's especially staggering when you think back to your drinking "prime." I've been drinking at the professional level since I was 18 years old. My prime came when I was about 21 or 22. It was not uncommon for us to show up at my parent's house, or Jeremy's basement, and between three people polish of a couple of 2-4s, and then still have a need to go get more.

I couldn't do that now, obviously. Most of us couldn't. I drink probably 1/8th of my former volume, which is likely for the best, but think about how many weekends such binges actually happened. Then add in all those booze-addled camping trips, birthday shakers. Boring Fridays. Sharks Club night. Hockey games. Tuesdays.

It all adds up. So, how many beers do you think you've drank?

That was our "if a tree falls in the woods does it make a sound" moment and work today. And now it's yours to ponder while you down pint after pint this fine Friday evening.


Tuesday, February 19, 2008

It's been awhile since I've written anything, but I promise something will come eventually - I've got a few things in the works, including one story that involves me getting trapped inside a garbage can (Well, not really, but close..).

In the meantime, here are some quotes I've been collecting, as well as a couple links you should check out but probably won't.

"I swear I've seen Bobby 10 times already." - Chris, hanging out near the bar at Sharks' Club on Saturday night.

"Penguins look sad when they're walking." - Buchs. (Editor's note: Of course they're sad - haven't you seen this movie?)

"It's actually a pretty acceptable movie, and not just for the gays - for the normals, too." - Bucholtz again, giving a review of the movie Juno, which isn't - too my surprise - a biopic on this guy right here.

"I just can't get behind religion." - Buchs, after a few midweek beers.

"I call Wednesday, 'Friday Jr.'" - Buchs explaing why, after said beers, it was OK to be a little tipsy on a weekday.

"I might've bought the bed for us, but it goes where I go." - Scott, explaining how he managed to keep his new king-sized bed at home, despite the fact that he gave it to Kelsey for Christmas before she moved back into her own place.

And now for something completely different: I don't follow NCAA basketball very closely (but still probably closer than most people) except to periodically check out how a few local players who I happen to know are doing. However, I found this today on Yahoo! and I immediately like this kid named Kevin Love a lot.

The shit he's taken from his own hometown and home state is sickening, but not altogether that surprising. God forbid we be proud of talented people.

And on a goofier note, go read this story about Jonathan Coulton, the former nerd/computer programmer who quit his job to become a nerd/rock star. He wrote a song a week for an entire year, and posted them on his website. His song and his story don't exactly conjure up images of Led Zeppelin, but anybody who writes songs about giant, lonely squid trying to "play" with ships (song: I Crush Everything), and insanely ridiculous homages to former baseball commish Kenesaw Mountain Landis, is okay in my books.

Additional tunes: Code Monkey, The Town Crotch, Re: Your brains - and a cover of Sir Mix A-Lot's Baby Got Back. Click on his name above and have a listen - it's all there online.

And that, folks, is all you're getting today. Oh - and how 'bout them Canucks?