:: Insomnia ::
It's 3:11 AM right now. I'd like to be sleeping. But I'm not. The evil monster that is insomnia has returned. My past three nights have all gone the same: Go to bed around 1:00. Lie awake until 3:00. Get up and waste time on my computer until 4:00. I eventually nod off around 5 or 5:30, the same time a lot of people are waking up to go to work. It's absolutely killing me. I've just got too many things running through my mind at night. As soon as my head hits the pillow it's like the floodgates open and out pours every conceivable thought, idea, memory, dream and joke you could possibly imagine.
Tonight, for example, the following things ran through my head: How much longer can I stand to be unemployed? When, if ever, is a really good job going to come along? I wonder how Mike, Meghan and Melissa are doing? Why don't I ever have anything interesting to talk about on MSN besides the weather? What's wrong with that? If I was rich, what kind of car would I buy? What would I do if i woke up and saw a shadowy figure on the ledge outside my window? Where is my baseball bat? It's in the garage, but I should really bring it into my room should I ever have an encounter with the shadowy figure on the ledge. If I moved far far away, maybe to...I don't know, North Dakota, how good of friends would I still be with certain people. Why do I sometimes feel like everyone else knows something that I don't? I wonder what life would be like if I was a professional baseball player. If I was, I'd like to play for the Red Sox.....
To use a word most people outside of Walnut Grove probably have never heard; it's a real shitfucker.