Tuesday, June 02, 2009

:: Random things I thought you should know ::

I don't have much in the way of a topic for today, but rather a collection of snippets for your enjoyment – including a couple quotes.

At The Keg, when I left excess crab bits in a few of the claws...
Christene: I'm so disappointed in you.
Me: Yeah, get used to saying that.

Christene: Your hands are really soft today.
Me: They aren't soft – they're very tough and masculine!
Christene: Oh, well I meant the tough kind of soft... like shaking hands with an axe.

At breakfast on Saturday, Kristyl asked me what our plans for the rest of the day were. I said we had nothing to do. Then Kristyl decided to be helpful:

Kristyl: What do you crazy kids have planned for tonight?
Me: Nothing.
Kristyl: Oh, well you should go and have some big seafood feast for dinner.
Me: Nah, don't feel like it.
Kristyl: You could go to the Richmond Night Market. We should all do that one day.
Me: No, that sounds terrible. I don't want to spent one half of my weekend nights at some crappy market buying shit from Japan and eating noodles.
Kristyl: Well, you could go buy a 40 of rum and go to a foam party!
Me: OK, you aren't really helping anymore.

Now, I have a complaint (I'm sure you're all shocked).

For starters, in town this week, there was a Greenpeace protest of a local grocery store. They were protesting against its seafood-buying practices or some such nonsense - the reason doesn't really matter.

What matters to me is how they were going about their business. Yes, they were well-behaved and polite, and didn't cause any great scene (which makes for a pretty shitty protestor, if you ask me), but what bugs me most is the way that they looked. Three or four of them were dressed up in huge, gaudy, bright tropical fish mascot suits, complete with cartoony eyes.

They looked campy and ridiculous, and I, for one, would not take them seriously in the least if I had come across them that day. I mean, in addition to the fact that they carried no big signs to explain what the fuck they were there for, they basically looked they were a promoting Finding Nemo 2: Gill's Revenge.

I don't know if the cartoon eyes on the suits were supposed to make the fish look cute, thereby convincing people not to eat them, but it failed. I mean, had they been wearing cute puppy costumes, I probably could be sold on the idea of not eating puppies, but it's a god damn fish.

And everybody knows fish don't have feelings.

C'mon, Greenpeace, you're supposed to be the experts at this shit.

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